I Hope You Dance

You say you wanna get off
This ride around the Sun
You say ' I've had enough
And it hasn't been much fun'

But He's the one that decides
The rounds each of us do
And leaves us all complaining
Some say 'so many' and others say 'so few'

The wailing babe got one & Grandma got ninety
It's meant for your enemy, your love and the mighty
But there is just one thing and one thing that I know
He promises while it lasts, a high follows the low

So hang on a little longer
Don't you know this ride is free?
Each ride just makes one stronger
& Baby its not just you and me

I'd try to be in your shoes
(I know you wouldn't mind)
But only you can wipe out those blues
Cause your size just ain't my kind

You ask me where love is
In a friend or in a foe
Oh baby it exists where your heart is!
So seek proof of it no more

Ive been wondering what to do
So I gave a rhythm to this rhyme
I hope you know its for you
Will you dance to it in time?

Music Mantra 2007

Another year full of dancing to life's tune. A year that just seemed so much simpler when it was accompanied by some memorable music.

Some of the songs that I heard again and again .... and may keep hearing for many years to come are -

Beetein Lamhe - The Train
It feels like ages since a song about lost love and the lingering memories ever touched me so much as this one! The tormenting, heart breaking poetry, the soulful guitar, piano & saxophone (?) and KK brilliant rendition makes this the my most heard song this year! I hear the song line by line .... the way a much treasured memory is revisited ..... one almost feels as if it is being lived again .... only to realise that that the moment is long lost.
The 'paradise lost' feel to this song reminds me of another all time favourite of mine -

Din Dhal Jaye Haye Raat Na Jaye, Guide
The particular verse -

Aisi Rimjhim Aisi Puhaaren
Aisi Hi Thi Barsaat
Khud Se Judaa Aur Jug Se Paraaye
Hum Dono The Saath
Phir Se Woh Saawan Ab Kyon Na Aaye
Din Dhal...

To Phir Aao Mujhko Satao (remix) - Awarapan
On a dark, warm and weary evening this mesmerising track just leaves me in a trance. It has a certain hypnotic quality to it - the way Mustafa Zahid desperately mouths- Aa Bhi Jao, Aa Bhi Jao I feel like getting up and ja-o-ing :D!

Laree Chhooti - Ek Challis Ki Last Local
Wow! Was what I said when I heard this one first! I love the positivity of the song and the way Abhay Deol with his laid back, jo bhi hoga dekha jayega attitude turns the song and his kismat around in those 4 minutes! The song has a soft rock feel to it.The guitar just makes one pick up even a badminton racquet and strum :D!

Tere Bin - Delhi Heights
A song I didn't understand straight away but my heart probably did! Wanted to make P hear it immediately. When I read the translation ... :) .... I couldn't wait for him to hear it :)! If you haven't heard this song closely please do. I don't feel like describing a song so close to my heart :)!

Mahiya (original and remix) - Awarapan
Hmmm original or remix? Well I think I love them both. I'd chose Mahiya (the slow original one by Annie) incase I feel like dancing. She fits in some belly dancing steps in her live version! But if I'm vacuuuming the house it's gotto be the Suzanne remix one. A peppy number. Thanks Sushil for getting me hooked to the original almost a month before the music of Awarapan released.

It's Rocking (remix)
Try standing or sitting straight while listening to this song - No don't just smile and read on - Just try! I can almost scientifically prove it to be impossible :D! Even my chair dances to this song! Seriously - its rocking....what say Samir ;)?

Ye Ishq Haye Baithe Bithaye Jannat Dikhaye - Jab We Met
Thanks Samir for this groovy one! We both got fooled by the crispy perky voice and mistook it for Alisha Chinai! Whooaaaa!!! This turned out to be Ms. Ghoshal! I've always felt her coy, sweet voice reminded me of Geeta Dutt. But this song just tells me that the Alisha Chinais, Sunidhi Chauhans and Suzannes should watch out for Ms. Ghoshal crossing over to what until now was their forte.

Mayya Mayya - Guru
Love the Arabic touch. Reminds me of Satrangi Re (Dil Se). A part of the music seems similar to San Sanana (Asoka), I guess both took it from a Safri Duo track. All the same great track for some dance :)!

Maula Mere - Anwar
Ohhhh! the sheer poetry and mesmerising, hypnotic feel to the song.
The words that worship -
Mujhse yeh har ghadi, mere lab kahe
teri hi ho sab guftagoo

The love that gets possessive -
Rakh loon chhupa ke mein kahin tujhko
saaya bhi tera na main doon

This song makes me close my eyes and listen.....feel.

Another song I love for similar reasons is Ajab Si ( Om Shanti Om)

Dhoom Again (Dhoom 2)
The song does give you a feeling of deja vu. The superb drum beats, whistle, bongo (?) and the image ( I must admit) of Greek God looking Hrithik! I just go - Once more common you people Dhoom Machale Dhoom! Sounds dramatic, grand and of course catchy! Louder I play this the more I love it!

Bol Na Halke - Jhoom Barabar Jhoom
A beautiful blend of the flute, guitar and santoor (?) The sincere voice of Rahat Fateh Ali Khan (invariably land up listening to Jiya Dhadak Dhadak from Kalyug too) and sweet melody of Meenakshi Iyer's voice just create magic. The lyrics are incredibly romantic too.

Aaoge Jab Tum Saajana - Jab We Met
Kasak - Chhodo Na Yaar are songs I love to hear in succession.

Mausam (The Train) , Chak De Phattey ( Khosla Ka Ghosla), Mind Blowing Mahiya ( Cash), Hello ( Speed), O Yaara Dhol Bajake ( Dhol), JBJ ( Jhoom Barabar Jhoom), Sajanaji Vaari Vaari ( Honeymoon Travels)

FROM 2006

Dheemey Dheemey -Bas Ek Pal
Bas Ek Pal (remix) -Bas Ek Pal
Ye Meri Kahani - Strings, Zinda
Maula - Zinda
Beedi - Omkara
Mitwa - KANK
Dekho Na - Fanaa


I've really enjoyed this post a great deal - cause it gave me the opportunity to write so much about my first love - Music!

For me Music is the Food of Love and all I say is - Play On....

If Wishes Had Wings ...My Heart Would Be The Launchpad .....

I'd Wish For -


Confidence that Life has in Death

Self Control that clouds have over rain unshed

Dependability that survival has on each breath

Sensitivity the blind have to read thoughts unsaid

Hope with which the dry earth looks up as dark clouds loom

Patience with which a tree waits to be in bloom

Humility which rises out of defeat

Dignity by which on sunrise the moon retreats

The keen desire to try and do,

Like a man has when his days are numbered and few



PS - Written in 2001 during Law class! I think subconsciously inspired by Tagore's This Is My Prayer I had read a few years before.
Will add on to this wish list :)!

I'll See You In Heaven ... I'll See You Again

If theres one thing that I remember about this photograph it is that I was looking at you ....& it was you who made me smile. (I'm the only girl not facing the camera! Sitting, second from the right)

I don't remember which Basketball win this was....or the names of some of the players. But I remember telling you that I get awfully tense while facing the camera I either look very serious or burst into giggles and look like an idiot. You had told me to just keep looking at you.

I did....& see what happened....

You're no where...... but you're still there.

To my dear friend.....

Just a few memories that are now left -

Of me praising you on how perfectly you polished your white keds & then stamping them dirty when you grinned proudly and then you reciprocating the favour & us both whitening our keds crazy with chalk on reaching school :D!

Of us returning from school by the Jadavpur Purbanchal bus...running, pushing...diving to get a place. Or hanging on to the bus door while giggling and chattering away.

Of you teasing me about the latest girls school heart throb from the boys school & pronouncing him to be the class's 'Pass Time Passion' or PTP as we referred to him on the sly when he was around in the bus!!! Of you ragging me when he got up to offer me a place to sit :D!

Of me acquainting you to all the highs and lows, figures and curves in Economics & Stats in exchange for you acquainting me to all the highs and lows, figures and curves ruling...well Filmfare :)

Of you and Mannu staying over at my place to get up early to stand in the line for college admission forms.

Of me feeling great that I'd got into the college of my choice...yet feeling bad that you both were not going to be there at the same college.

Of us loosing touch with the passage of time.

Of me getting to know about the shortage of time.

Of me in the knowledge today that those two years were all the time we would have on Earth together.

But Dear Friend.....I'll see you in heaven...I'll see you again

Gandhi Jayanti

Last Friday we visited the State Rooms at the Buckingham Palace where an exhibition marking the 60th Wedding Anniversary of the Queen was on. There were expensive gifts... and there were ridiculously expensive gifts.

But my eyes were seeking the cheapest and yet priceless gift of them all!

The specific gift I was looking for was - a cloth woven from the yarn specially spun by Mahatma Gandhi for the Queen bearing the words 'Jai Hind'. Do read more about it here.

As children we would enjoy the day off at home. My Mother would force us to watch 'Gandhi' the movie by Richard Attenborough. I remember finding the movie very boring and cursing Doordarshan for showing the same movie 3 times a year ... year after year - on Independence and Republic Day and on 2nd October. They're saving money on hiring another movie I would say :D!

With the passing years 2nd October completely lost its significance. It became a day- off between two exams and later an 'unofficial' working day.
If I did enjoy a holiday, Doordarshan was definitely not the channel I was watching!

Two years back I read Louis Fischer's - The Life of Mahatma Gandhi.
Why I read it ...I really don't know....but I have developed an interest in our history.
Maybe because in a strange way I feel more 'Indian' here than I have ever felt back home in India.

Here, after seeing oh- so-many programmes on the many wars Britain has fought... have I developed a great admiration and respect for our powerful yet non-violent Struggle for Independence. Here our experiences seem more real and not just page in my History book.

A friend once remarked that though Gandhiji is probably the strongest symbol of Non Violence and despite being nominated 5 times he was never awarded the Nobel Prize. I doubt if it would have mattered either way to him. Do read the article on the Missing Laureate.

"Generations to come, it may be, will scarce believe that such one as this ever in flesh and blood walked upon this earth". -A Einstein on M K Gandhi

This year I watched the movie 'Gandhi' on tv on 15 August in London..... & my Mother was not here forcing me!

Yes, I guess I'm evolving very slowly....and trying, in a small way, to be the change I (you) wish to see in the world.

Cash Rain as India Reigns

I'm just on a high thanks to our Twenty Twenty victory! Victory has never been so long awaited ....or tasted so sweet!

But what shades my present euphoria is the news of rewards to some players and nothing for others.

First came news of the BCCI, State governments and corporates giving monetary rewards.
Then came the reaction from the Hockey fraternity claiming 'step motherly' treatment.
Now news of our players under the Modi government in Gujarat and those from Kerala not being rewarded.
Then the Karnataka government accepting their gaffe and rewarding some hockey players as an after thought.

Region, religion, favoritism - all dampening the very spirit I was high!

If I were a cricketer in this team I wonder which State would reward me! My Father was from Karnataka, Mother from Maharashtra & I was born and brought up in W Bengal! I guess it would just become another issue about which government should pay! Hmmmm but while I'm still dreaming of being a World Cup winning cricketer let me take it a step further ....maybe I'd be rewarded by all 3 states with each wanting a piece of me :D! Who knows!

But lets just account for all the rewards -

Rohit Sharma - Rs. 10 lakhs
Ajit Agarkar - Rs. 10 lakhs
Joginder Sharma -Rs 21 lakh
Rudra Pratap Singh -Rs. 10 lakhs
Gautam Gambhir and Virender Sehwag -Rs. 5 lakhs each

The BCCI president Sharad Pawar has already declared an award of $2 million for the Indian team.

The team had already earned $4,90,000 in official prize money for winning the tournament.

I can go on and on ... and I haven't even come to Dhoni or Yuvraj Singh.

But I want to make a point.

The point being - do they need to be rewarded by money, cars and flats or have they been already been rewarded by carving a priceless place in Indian cricket/ hockey history!
If one feels that they need to be given cash rewards shouldn't that be left to their employers and not the government.


With these victories, cricket again sells! Advertisers like LG (LG had announced withdrawal from cricket advertising in March after India's poor performance in the World Cup tournament) are back and so are some regular biggies. The advertising world is caught in a frenzy. Surely the team would earn big bucks!

I'm not FOR Cash rewards for any kind of achievement, be it in cricket, hockey or any other sphere. When you need money a cash reward is a great carrot to dangle. But most of these players have gone beyond 'needing' or 'wanting' money! Money does make a difference to new players who haven't made a tidy sum in endorsements. But after a while I feel one plays for a different set of reasons - for enjoyment, honor, pride, dominance, records....& money may figure way below in the list.

I do understand the point the hockey players are making by wanting to go on a hunger strike. But I wonder if it feels any better now that the Karnataka govt has 'rewarded' them with Rs. 2 lakhs each to help them lick their wounds! I feel what they are really clamouring for is 'Recognition' by their countrymen...and at the right time!

How many of us really know what went on in the Asia Cup? I must admit to be guilty of knowing only that we won!
Let's for once stop blaming the Government...the Media for promoting just Cricket.
The Media sells what we buy!

So save the tax payers money - for once Give them a Break (pun intended). Spend it where that money will go a long way...& there Are many such ways! The MIB have made enough to afford a luxurious life style, the hotel or sports academy they plan to open and savings for the next few generations.

Yes, Recognition must be shown.

I loved the novel way the Swiss Government recognised Roger Federer when he won the Wimbledon. A cow when he won the first time ....& a giant horn (Alphorn) when he won the second!

& Lets for once be more aware!

ummm.... Hockey lessons anyone?

The Third Eye

I strolled towards Band Stand at Regent Park this afternoon. The Sun, was out in all its splendor on this Wednesday......the park was buzzing with people enjoying in the Sun.

The stunted arthritic lady feeding the swans some bread with her disfigured hands.
Children speeding on their bikes loosing some off that pent up energy.
The photographer finally finding the right amount of light for an outdoor photo shoot.
A heated exchange of .....words here.....and glances there.
The bikini clad woman roasting in the Sun for that 'natural' tan. The lines...

One ray the more, one shade the less
Had half impaired the nameless grace

....come to my mind.

Byron should have called the poem She Basks for Beauty...rather than 'She Walks in Beauty'! :D!

It was just one of those days when my feet led my thoughts and my thoughts just happily followed on. ....ummm well not really. I was here out of curiosity. I had come to listen to the choir of the blind children of Milton Margai School in Freetown, Sierra Leone.

I didn't know that Sierra Leone is a country in West Africa. But if there's one thing I do know....it's that I don't know much!

Sierra Leone is one of the poorest countries in the world with the highest infant mortality rate and average life expectancy of about 40 years. During the American Revolutionary War enslaved Africans were promised freedom if they sided with the British and many did. Freetown was founded in 1787 as a home for the slaves who were later freed. It's a strange world where the British enslaved them for years and later 'freed' them. In the recent past Britain along with the UN has played an 'important part' in ending rebel activities and bringing about peace.The children were here to Thank the British. After all the exploitation I'm not convinced about all the gratitude! Anyways....

The choir had already started performing....I stared at them....took in what I saw. Dark colored children in bright colorful uniform and ribbons. Merrily singing and moving from on foot to another in rhythmic motion. There were about 25 children and they sang in several languages spoken in their country and also in English!

On a closer look their faces showed signs of a difficult life. Some of them had lost their sight due to some disease. Safi, aged 13 lost her father 4 years back...he was killed by rebels. When she cried out... the rebels poured burnt plastic over her eyes.

Yet the children say - "We cannot see, but we will conquer"

....and conquer they did :)!

I wish I could tell you how my favorite tune went. But I guess that's for me to carry in my heart. But yes, it did make me and a few others dance and sway in the park with a hundred other onlookers :)

I lay down on the grass and closed my eyes trying to keep the Sun away. But within a few minutes my skin started burning and the Sun invaded my thoughts....bringing me back to reality. They couldn't 'see' the hundred of us enjoying their music!!! But they could feel how much we enjoyed their performance only if we joined in with loud resounding claps!!!

One of the performances was of 4 blind boys playing an instrument which resembled the Bongo! They were led on to the stage by their teacher.

What a performance the boys put up! It was like a jugalbandi! What co-ordination...what timing! They truly left us spell bound. The crowd responded with 'Yeaaa' 'Whooaaaa', loud applause and lots of people shaking a leg to the pulsating music! People flocked to witness the performance and the place started to get really crowded.....Regents Park rocked!!!

I couldn't help but smile as I stood their mesmerized.....what was the afternoon about.... music... children... hope...?

But what an Eye Opener this has turned out to be!

Walk of Life

This Summer has been really good. We went for a Bird Walk at Regents Park. We really didn't see many birds (wish I could go to Ranganathittu again!) -we had even bought binoculars for the occasion - but I guess you need to go for several such bird walks till you actually start looking out for the birds and not spotting mere movement of leaves after the bird has flown off! The walk was really refreshing. I've never really been a 'nature lover'.... but I guess things were just getting too much for me and so for the first time I too visited a place where I was free of mundane thoughts - actually free of any thought. The best part was I didn't know what to expect - what birds I would see, I barely saw any; yet I got beyond my expectation.

The other was the Butterfly walk at Richmond Park. Richmond park has wild deer. I was not very enthusiastic cause I felt the chances of actually seeing them was slim. But when i found out about the Butterfly Walk we did go for it.

There is something about nature - such unparalleled beauty and yet so unpretentious. We went in search of only butterflies - stumbled upon spiders, grasshoppers, nameless insects,flowers, beautiful trees - some decaying some blossoming yet all playing their indispensable role. Even the dead rotting tree-on which moss grew, under which mushrooms grew, beside it lay a dead crow which had made the tree it's tombstone, in it was an ant home and on it several people like me had sat, lost in thought.

Nature has her own moods. And not just the extreme ones. The birds turned lazy because it was a cold day & hence we saw fewer birds on the Bird Walk day. The butterflies decided it was no time to tap dance from one flower to another on a windy day, and hence we saw less of them.




I was completely captivated by a butterfly, surprisingly not for its stunning beauty but by its silent magnetism. I had long before got frustrated and given up my ambitious plan of going after a specific butterfly and trapping it in a photograph. But this temptress (Speckled Wood) literally drew me. Made me feel like, I guess, a confused schoolboy in complete admiration for his first crush. I didn't know whether to show my interest and pursue the beauty or behave utterly nonchalant and walk on by. I would shamelessly follow ....she would shyly disappear. I would loose heart.... & she would appear! This went on for 10 minutes. She was so unsure of me....and I was sure of loosing either her or my group which had gone ahead. I would look back at the group gathering together to discover another treasure and wonder what I was missing out on. She sensed my hesitation...judged my insincerity....posed long enough for me to take a picture (that will never do justice to her free spirit) and waved off a dismissal to this schoolboy for ever!

The informative walk should have left me more wise..I realized I knew nothing.

I was a bit tired, hungry and very philosophical. Here I was in a world where the roads didn't have names, there was no map, my mobile network was weak, my leather wallet could only antagonise a wild animal further, my only defense if I met a deer would be to raise my hands in the air and prove I'm not there to harm (as instructed by our guide).

Yet I felt one with this world.

We took a break. Sadly, those few extra moments I got while eating an apple made me live not for the present moment...but for the future. 'Time' and 'Place' regained possession of the mind and banished peace.

The butterfly had made me feel forlorn and I was in no mood to go looking for deer which maybe anywhere in the large park and would look exactly like the one in any wildlife book or channel!!!

I had things to do - a train to catch, food to cook, a house to hoover, a machine cycle to run.......which is when I saw my first wild deer out of simply nowhere.
My excitement was no less than Sita's may have been - but my deer was much more than hers - my deer was REAL!

We both ran towards her....and she stared mockingly at our clumsy steps. I don't know how many million creatures I trampled below one step - unaware of their existence only because I....I couldn't see them. But They were There!

As we drew close we saw several deer. We watched them closely. They looked at us & saw...two beings who've run only to catch a train knowing that there was another one following in 3 minutes. No we didn't deserve a second glance- they got back to doing what deer do at 2 pm on a Summer day. And we got back to doing what human beings do - gape and tape!

We stood still and didn't go any closer. But there was a bambi with countless questions, that I would like to believe ...took to us.
Bambi took a look at us and went to her Mother...Who are they?
Mother indifferently - Human beings.
She came to take another look and ran back to Mother; will they be staying with us?
No they will go in a few minutes.
Another 15 visits (each time grower bolder and coming closer) and inspection of us and another 15 questions answered while chewing on some grass.

FLASH!!!

Mother do they have a star?
...no thats only a stupid camera that looses its shine when the battery goes down.

Mother can I ask them to join us?

And then THAT look! No, not to dear bambi. But to us!!! That flash of maternal instinct - warning us to behave ourselves and retreat.
We felt guilty and ashamed of so many things- bambi's first lesson never to trust us.

This was the 2nd time a animal/bird had told me that I was invading their space by just one look! To be honest I really did nothing to provoke them , but then thats in MY court of justice. The other warning I had got was from a peacock in Foutainbleau . The peacock suddenly raised his splendid feathers and gave them a shake. If you think it is comparable to a dance - stop romanticizing! Imagine a hundred eyes glaring at you and telling you to back off! Beautiful sure...but dangerous :)

What I had expected I didn't get....I got the unexpected, which was much, much more than my expectations. So much that more than two months later I still feel like writing about it ...and still feel my words dont do justice to the experience.

Back in the tube with sunburnt skin, hair careless tied, muddy shoes (I fell in a mud pit while photographing some dragon flies!), kurti-jeans, dusty cap, jacket full of new found treasure ('beautiful' leaves, 'beautiful' flowers, 'beautiful' stone.....).... I look at my co passengers in their suits and evening gowns.
Do we stay in the same world?
I Dont know and I Dont want that to hear the answer to that question.

I just close my eye and live the experience I just had again......

{Written in '06}